Gutfeld: Shocked media reaction to Biden's debate performance appears to be another cover-up

For now, Democrats seem more confused than Ilhan Omar on her wedding night. Democrats, of course, are trying to figure out what just happened. The 40 percent of Americans who reside on the left apparently believed that behind closed doors, Joe Biden was sharp, engaged, and authoritarian. That’s what this Democratic senator said a few weeks ago.

SENATOR CHRIS COONS, JUNE 5: Those of us who serve alongside President Biden, who know him, who have had the opportunity to interact with him up close and personal, in meetings at the White House and at public and private events, can say that he is sharp, engaged and authoritative.

That’s right! And I’m the favorite to win the world’s ugliest man contest, but boy, did they get a rude awakening, worse than when I asked Taylor Swift to leave before breakfast. Turns out Joe is as sharp as a jelly ball and half as strong. Meanwhile, the rest of us have a few questions of our own: Here’s the first question to the media that pretends to be shocked by Biden’s insanity. Are you kidding me? By the way, that’s the same question Biden asks every day. Just kidding, pants can’t talk. But the idea that the media is shocked seems like another cover-up.

TOP SHIT JOURNALISTS ADMISS THEY WERE ‘DISCOURAGED’ BY EVIDENCE OF BIDEN’S MENTAL DECLINE DUE TO ‘RIGHT-WING MEDIA’ HYPE

Yeah, the same people who told us Joe was about to get his black belt in Brazilian jiu-jitsu now expect us to believe they had no idea Joe had the brains of a can of expired Trump steaks. So here’s what we should want to know: First, who exactly orchestrated this scam, who spread the talk that Joe was FDR when he was actually stillborn? Because suddenly they’re all on the same page. Was it the media? Who was so far behind the rest of us that they’re just clueless, bubble-wrapped lapdogs? Or did they just decide to cover up the coverup? By circling the crime scene they helped create.

CNN, MONDAY: It's not fair to say that it's just one night. There were times like this when people saw the cameras and times when the cameras weren't there.

MSNBC Channel: Doubts about his ability to do so, and about his ability to govern for another four years, persist, doubts expressed publicly and privately, including among some of the most essential and important supporters of any campaign: major donors.

WHITE HOUSE PRESS CORPS DEFENDS BIDEN AGE COVERAGE: 'IT'S COMPLICATED'

MSNBC, TUESDAY: The president and his advisers are in the midst of damage control after last week's disastrous debate.

This is great acting, they’re making Darren from Bewitched look like Laurence Olivier. Now, clearly someone has been keeping Joe’s ineptitude quiet for a while, and they hoped Biden would survive the debate, which he didn’t. Because, remember, first Joe was fine, then he got some cheap knockoffs, then he got a cold, and now he’s tired from traveling too much. Travel that happened ten days before the debate. Maybe it’s long COVID, polio, bird flu, Ebola, although I thought viruses needed a living host. But I haven’t heard this many virulent excuses since my assistant accidentally booked me an economy ticket. Enjoy unemployment, sister.

So if this is a cover-up of a cover-up, then who ran this long con? Was it Jill, the DNC, the heads of the major TV networks, Rachel Maddow’s hairdresser? Either way, they all have more blood on their hands than a trembling vampire. Are the bosses of these corporate media outlets right now demanding answers from their employees about why they missed the biggest story of their lives, or, more likely, are they responsible for the talking points? Could it be that exposing a Democratic president doesn’t pay big bucks, but chasing Trump 24/7 does. Here’s another pesky question, now that the entire nation is watching Joe’s condition. Shouldn’t we be demanding to know who’s running the country? He’s not, and hasn’t been for a while. The old fart couldn’t run his own bath.

KARINE JEAN-PIERRE RESPONDS TO POINTE IF BIDEN SUFFERED FROM DEMENTIA AFTER A DISASTROUS DEBATE

Oddly enough, there are still Democrats who say everything is fine. It’s also a sign that they know Biden is not in charge and hasn’t been for some time. So who’s behind the scenes? Who made the decision to withdraw from Afghanistan? Who decided to hand over billions in advanced lethal weapons to the Taliban? Who actually approved the student loan bailout? Who weaponized our justice system? And for God’s sake, who the hell policed ​​the border? I mean, you could say Joe is in charge because only a mentally ill person could have agreed to all of this, except, and here’s the rub, when someone is insane, they can have nonsense in their head, but they have no way of acting on it.

This is the counter-argument you hear when someone pleads insanity. The act of murder might have been insane, but the planning, the planning was not. So my last question, will we ever know the real answer to anything? Or will the Washington media complex quickly create another hoax to keep us busy? Think of all the major hoaxes, from the 97% of climate experts who agree that global warming is man-made, to the 51 former intelligence officers who called the laptop Russian disinformation, how many were initiated and then organized by the same kind of people. So who did this to you?

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And will you let them do that again? If you say no, then prepare yourself for next time.